Responsibility

How do you feel today?

Are you a pleasant person to be around with? Sometimes we think too much of our surroundings that we forget about the most important things of all. Ourselves.

It is not to say that we should only think about ourselves and leave everyone else be. The people around us are important. Many of times we have over expectations of ourselves to meet the expectations of others.

As a child, how often have you followed the instructions of your parents? When we were children, we tend to think all that our parents teach us is correct because our minds are like a blank sheet of paper. Whatever our parents do, we tend to follow. Whatever our parents say, we tend to mimic. It is just natural. There is probably only a handful out there who would have their own mindset at such a tender age.

Back then, if a child talks back to the parents, they would be considered as a difficult child. It is due to the teachings passed down from generations to generations. No party is at fault. Perhaps parents should spend time understanding why the child is behaving as such. May be the child is notorious. May be not. It is the duty of parents to find out why their children act as such instead of just giving them the negative notion that their parents have been using on them over the years. It is not fair to just simply judge based on what we see on the surface.

In the current modern age, if a child talks back to the parents, they would be labelled differently by individuals. Times have changed. The old ways are not always agreed by everyone anymore. Some will still label the child as disobedient. Some will be able to see that the child is hungry for attention from the parents. Some will be amazed how the child can be so intelligent. Whatever everyone else say is not important. It is still the responsibility of the parents to understand why their children behave such a way.

Parents have a huge responsibility over the family that they are trying to build. It is time to realize that, as a parent, you cannot escape being someone you might not be. If you choose to have children with your partner, you have the responsibility over how your children develop. There is no doubt about it.

Many parents these days are just too busy to spend time with their family. Perhaps it is time to ask yourselves these questions.

Are you starting a family because of willingness?
Are you starting a family because it is the right thing to do?
Are you starting a family because everyone else is doing it?
Are you starting a family because it was an unexpected event?
Are you starting a family because you want to please your partner?

The sense of willingness is at stake. Many people just start having a family for the sake of giving their parents grandchildren. Some people just start having a family because their friends all have children. Whatever it is, it is by choice. Nobody can force you to do anything you do not wish to do. Once you have chosen, it is your responsibility to stay till the end.

Whether or not the child is born in the way you want, you are responsible.
Whether or not the child is grows up to be the person you are proud of, you are responsible.

You are totally responsible for your child. Never ever blame your children for keeping you at home, not being able to go clubbing with your friends. Never ever blame your children for spending too much time with computer games when you yourself are on your smart phone all the time. Never ever blame your children for acting out whenever something does not happen the way they want because they are just mimicking you. Never ever blame your children for being closer to your maid than you because you never spend enough time with them. Never ever blame your children for talking back at you as you never keep your promise to them.

It is easy to play the blame game but ultimately, being a good parent is not a job, it is a responsibility.

 

To say you have no choice is to relieve yourself of responsibility.

Patrick Ness, British-American author and lecturer, 1971-present