Matters

What is the important thing we should focus on right now?

We have different perception at different stages in life. There is no one size fits all for anyone because whenever we encounter something new, we get enlightenment one way or the other. Whichever way we choose, it seems to be the right choice at that moment itself but then becomes irrelevant when we reach another stage of life.

Children tend to focus solely on play. This is because they feel play is fun and provides happiness. At that moment, joy is of utmost importance in their life. Nothing else seem to matter. However, there are those not so fun activities that they still have to deal with in the midst of having fun; school and studies. Some children find it interesting to learn something new in class and make friends along the way. There are always some who end up piling stress on their shoulders because they simply do not like the way classroom works. There are also some who become somebody else when they are in class because they want to be a top performer.

Guardians play an important role to guide the young minds to become better each day. As adults, it is our responsibility to nurture a better generation to come, not to impose upon them the dreams we have not achieved. Each individual should be allowed their own choice of life. Whether or not they make it through school with flying colours really does not matter. What matters most is that they become someone whom they want to become. As long as they are kind to themselves, others and nature, everything is worth-while.

People in the working environment tend to be obsessed with climbing up that career path or the total opposite, just working for the sake of money to pay the bills. While everyone makes their own choices, what really matters is the satisfaction within.

The hardworking people sometimes work too hard they have forgotten that life has many other elements to it. There should be time to spend with the family, friends, and oneself. Life is not just about being in the office and work through the day with minimal time for family, some time for friends, and no time at all for yourself. Life is about balancing between what seems important and what seems can be neglected.

Has it ever occurred to you that you are important?
Have you ever questioned what life is about?
How do you want to live the rest of your remaining life?
Is it living day to day?
Or you want that sense of fulfillment till your last breathe?

Humans have been searching for centuries of what life means. Everyone have different findings as each one has a different perception of how life should be. However vast the differences in opinion is, it only comes down to one thing.

Nothing really matters if one has no health.

You can have a bucket list full of things you want to achieve in life. But if you have no health, how are you going to achieve it? It is not impossible, you just need to find alternative paths to finally reach your goals.

How can you climb Mount Everest if you are 80 years old and laying in the hospital bed almost taking your last breath? Is there a way to go around it? Do you just lay there full of regrets for not taking great care of your health when you were younger and when you had the chance? Or do you keep on fighting till the end, telling yourself that you will walk again like you were in your twenties? The choice is yours.

It does not matter how limited your resources is, it only matters how resourceful you are. The human mind is the magical tool we each have. How we choose to use it is entirely up to us. You can choose to keep thinking of your limited resources, or you can choose to think of different solutions to a situation. Be the person you really want to be and live with no regrets.

Be kind to yourself, others, and nature. Nothing else matters.

 

Everyone goes through adversity in life, but what matters is how you learn from it.

Louis Leo Holtz (Lou Holtz), former American football player and coach, 1937-present

Objection

Can I be a public speaker if I’m an introvert?
Can I run my on business if I’m a slow thinker?

We are humans and with our humongous brains, we tend to overthink things. Sometimes, totally irrelevant things. We love to worry about anything under the sky that has got nothing to do with the situation we are in. Why is that so?

With such a massive brain, we should be geniuses creating magic around the world and yet, we just keep getting comfortable in the same place every time. We keep giving ourselves lames excuses not to venture into new realms. We keep having objections that do not even exist at the time we are faced with the opportunities. We love to just give up without even trying. Why is that so?

Everything happens for a reason.

I keep insisting this very point. If something is happening to you at this juncture, there is always a reason behind it. Perhaps you do not see the good in it right now but it surely will bring you value at some point of time. You just need to be open-minded to see for yourself the great things that are coming your way. If you just keep yourself in the little box you have been in the whole time, nothing will be able to penetrate through to you. You do not learn from mistakes. You do not get value in return from your wrong-doing.

It is your own obligation to acknowledge your failure in order to improve yourself. It is your own obligation to see that you learn from your past to create your better future. It is your own obligation to start something new to change your life, and see through to it. It is only when you are determined enough to do whatever it takes and believe that all actions you have taken is to help you reach your goals, you will succeed in life.

Even if you fail now, it does not mean you are not progressing. You learn along the way. You learn from your mistakes. You learn to make better choices.

If you fall into a ditch, it is okay. You get drenched in through and through. You get down and dirty. You are totally soiled and demotivated. What do you do?

You can get up, climb out of that filth, and start anew.
Or, you can go with the flow, get washed into the deep ocean, and drown.
Or, you can swim across oceans to find the best island to settle down.

Whichever way you choose is not important. What is important is how you look at whatever situation you are in. Some people get up easily which is great. Some people just give up and give in. Some people are slower in making decisions but they have set up high ambitions and make it happen. Which kind of person do you choose to be?

There is no right or wrong in whichever path one chooses. There is only the question of whether or not you will regret your non-action when the time comes for you to take your last breath. We will all die one day. Perhaps the only question we should ask ourselves every single time we reach a decision juncture is, “Am I going to regret it?”

Each of us has a limited time in this life. While I do believe that our soul lives on as an energy mass after death, I still would like to make the best out of this physical body of mine right now in this life. What I do with my limited lifetime here is entirely up to me. What you do with your limited lifetime here is entirely up to you. There is no need to compare to one another. Never ever let anyone else control the way you should live your life. You deserve to make your own decisions. You deserve to be your better self. You deserve the freedom to choose.

When someone else tell you no, you only need to tell them “OBJECTION, this is my life! I choose my own path and I will be responsible for every action that I take.”

 

I should have no objection to go over the same life from its beginning to the end: requesting only the advantage authors have, of correcting in a second edition the faults of the first.

Benjamin Franklin, American polymath and inventor, 1706-1790

Perfect

What if it does not work?

What exactly do you want work? Do you mean that you want it to work at your every first attempt? Do you in other words mean that you want your life to be perfect?

Everybody wants their life to be perfect. But what exactly is perfect? Your definition of perfect can be very different from mine. We are all individuals and we have our own perception of everything in this world. Each incident has two sides of the story, just like each individual having two faces.

You did not read wrongly, each individual has two faces. Perhaps you do not want to admit it but it is a fact. One is the highly motivated positive face, and the other is the downside normal skeptical face. Westerners call it the angel and the devil. Taoist call it yin and yang. Whatever names we choose to call it, each of us do have two faces.

Success only presents itself to those who are in balance.

Being motivated is good. You have the energy to take anything to its highest levels. You have the courage to drive yourself uphill. However, being overly motivated can sometimes pose a threat. Because you are so confident in yourself you can become ignorant to the signs that the universe is trying to communicate to you. You are too busy scrambling your way through the jungle, you ignored all the important pleasures of life. You forgot to just stop once in a while to observe your surroundings. You forgot to stop once in a while to simply breathe and belong. You will reach the top faster than everyone else but there is a sense of emptiness within you that is hard to recover.

You can be wealthy of money but poor in relationship.
You can be healthy of relationship but weak in self-love.
You need to be present. You need to be here now.

Being skeptical is good. You can find the problem before everyone else. But being overly skeptical is a problem altogether. It is because you scrutinize everything that comes your way, you tend to lose opportunities. Way too many chances are just gone because of your doubt. Those questions that you keep asking yourself. What if you fail? What if people laugh at me? What if people hate me? What if it does not work? What if … what if … These endless “what if’s” are not going to get you anywhere. After a decade or two, you should already realize that you need to change but somehow, you are still where you were. By the time you are ready to finally make the first move, it could already be too late for some.

“What if” is the first two words of a question we can ask ourselves differently:
What if I can make the difference?
What if I regret for not taking action?
A question can be good or bad depending on how we choose to phrase it.
A question can make a huge variance to which path we choose to take.
When you ask a question, ask wisely.

What makes a successful person?

Anyone can be a successful person. We only need to learn to balance ourselves in all situations. This is a skill that people learn over time. Even if the person is born with the life of an emperor, he has to decide to take the path moving towards becoming a good emperor. Otherwise, his empire will be very short-lived. Throughout his entire journey to becoming an emperor, he has to face many challenges. While he is an emperor, he has to try to turn enemies into allies. Before he steps down from this throne, he has to train his successor to become the person fit to rule the entire civilization. All the choices he make, he has to balance between good and bad, educated and spontaneous, love and war.

There is not a single decision by anyone in the world that is good for everyone. It is always positive for some and negative for others. It only matters that the decision made is for the good of the majority and less painful for the rest.

Life is not perfect. Accept this for a fact and you will feel better.

 

Nobody’s perfect. We’re all just one step up from the beasts and one step down from the angels.

Jeannette Walls, American author and journalist, 1960-present

Late

Many things in life are measured by time. Time is just one of the ways to determine our success.

Late is a word created to let us know that timing is important in many cases but is not a death sentence in most. We have to understand the possible origin of the word.

In the past, life is harsh. The early humans learn from the hard way. They live by the weather. They have to be prepared for the worst. There is a season for hunting. There is a season for agriculture. There is a season to stock up. It is just the way life was. Every little time they have, they need to use it wisely or it is a matter of life and death, not only for themselves but possibly for the whole tribe as well. Therefore, they stick to their strict schedule day by day, year after year. If they are just a day late, everyone’s life could come to an end.

In the current day, life is not as harsh. Humans have found ways to deal with difficult times. There is no need for hunting for food. The agriculture industry has expanded far and wide to provide for the worlds’ needs. We can buy any type of food we want, produce from any country we desire, at any time we choose to. Food is easily available everywhere, any time.

Unless we are staying in a desert or a barren ground, nothing is ever too late.

There are still people living in scarcity. They need help from everyone else from around the globe to get them through difficult times. If we think that life is unfair to us, think again. At least we have a place to go back to every night, called home. At least we have people who care about us in any situations, called family. At least we have ourselves to return to in a sane mind. Not everyone is as lucky as us.

Self-positivity is the only way to remind ourselves that we are fortunate.

We should be grateful for what we have and help the lesser in any way we can. Lending a helping hand to others is always the best way to show gratitude. One can only help when one is grateful. One can only be grateful when one has something to offer. Life is fair. It is never too late to extend help to those in need. It is an action that will improve the life of others. It is a noble act.

We are always hustling through life in the city. People living in urban areas often have a shorter lifespan compared to those in the countryside. While life in the city is full of colours, we should learn to strike a balance between the vibrant lights and the calmness within.

Whatever that is external, leave it be. There are many things that we cannot control, many events that make us regret. Whatever has happened is history. There is no turning back. Whatever that is going to happen has not arrived yet. Why waste time worrying about it? Living in the present is how life should be.

Whatever that is internal, we can explore. How much time do we spend on ourselves? Not the time we put on makeup, not the time we face the computer or mobile phone, but the time we just remain quiet and listen to our inner voice. We usually have all sorts of reasons not to do so. There is no time to doing so. Life is only as busy as we want it to be. If we have time to spend on work, friends, and the social media, we surely can spare a little for ourselves. We have to understand that the only person who will be with us till our last breath is none other than ourselves.

It is never too late. We may be late for work, for that important conference, but we can never be too late for what we want to achieve. Perhaps we are ageing but age is not a hurdle, it is an advantage. With age comes experience. If we had not done it before, that means the time is not right. If we stop ourselves now because of the wrong mindset, we are just allowing negativity rule on us.

Life continues. Pursue now, it is never too late to start.

 

Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.

Robert Lewis Balfour Stevenson (Robert Louis Stevenson), Scottish novelist, poet and writer, 1850-1894

Regret

Regret is only a feeling. It is a ridicule. Dwelling in it takes us nowhere.

We are individuals. We are special in our own way. There is no need to compare ourselves with other family member or peers that we know of. If others are willing to teach, we should be ready to learn. While people can teach us many things by words, it is only wise to also observe the way of life our mentors are living. Anyone can be our mentor. Choose wisely.

There are people that we look up to because they are quick at everything. It seems that they have many ideas to which they will take action even before knowing what is to be expected. These people are merely quick-tempered. It is because they are too fast, everyone else is too slow for them. Whatever that they have in mind today, they would have expected it done yesterday. When it is still pending, they will be angry at everyone around them.

Everyone else sees them as being too quick to judge. They hardly ever regret on their decisions even it could have been the break point where life ends because they would have thought of another new idea by then. While having many ideas is good, perhaps all ideas should be written down to be picked on the best before taking action on any.

Humans tend to be born at two opposite ends. While we envy the fast, we also look up to the careful decider for advice.

People who are fast cannot be slow, and people who are careful are never fast. Some people are spending most of their time just thinking of means and ways to go about a problem. They are afraid of making mistakes. They loathe the feeling of regret. Sometimes, they just sit on the list of dos and don’ts for ages, never ever deciding on any to take action upon. Every time there is a feeling to move forward, something else will be pulling backwards.

While being careful is great, we cannot be too careful about everything. A lot of times, we do need to take action to finally see the outcome. Nobody can predict the future, so, why worry about it? Perhaps it would be easier to just strike off those unrelated or unworkable ideas, concentrate on those that may or may not shine, then pick on the one that we think best works for us. Loitering in between too many to decide on brings us nowhere. If we take too long, the opportunity just evaporates, we may regret for the rest of our lives.

Never let ourselves regret for not taking action.

We need to find balance in between. Being too quick to decide without much thought and being too slow that time runs out. We have to understand that time do not wait. Once the minute is past, there is no bringing back.

When we are young, we may think that we still have a lot of time to spend. This may be true to a certain point if we compare the time that we have to the time our parents have. But, life is too short to push everything till tomorrow. Nothing else in life is worth more than life itself.

We often think that our studies, career, and friends are more important than family, nature, and self. We need to set our priorities right. Though we may be young today but time passes swiftly and before we know it, we are already in our thirties, forties, fifties, and so on. How much time did we spend with our grandparents, and parents? How much time did we spend with nature? How much time did we spend for ourselves?

However active we want our lives to be, we should always have time aside for the little things that matter in life. Perhaps we now think that we should hustle through time to get what we want so that we do not regret not taking action upon it. While being the action taker, have we ever thought of the values and effects it brings to others and ourselves? What is the use of having success without health? Who do we have to share our success without love? How can we help others without life?

We need sufficient rest for health and clarity. Live with no regrets!

 

Regret is an appalling waste of energy, you can’t build on it – it’s only good for wallowing in.

Kathleen Mansfield Murry nee Beauchamp (Katherine Mansfield), New Zealand writer and poet, 1888-1923